It’s been two weeks since Miley Cyrus twerked her way onto the “Former Child Stars Gone Bad” list.
Which got me thinking.
What if our children’s most beloved (or most polarizing) star, Caillou, ever fell from grace? I think the press release would go a little something like this:
Former child star Caillou was arrested in Quebec on Saturday for shoplifting from Wal-mart. Caillou, best known for his seminal work on the hit children’s cartoon series “Caillou”, was stopped by security guards after they noticed suspicious lumps in his yellow t- shirt. Caillou was found to have toilet paper, light bulbs, socks for Rosie, and crayons on his person that he did not pay for.
Witnesses at the scene described a bald young man in handcuffs wearing a yellow t-shirt, blue shorts, and red shoes. He was overheard whining loudly, “But whhhhyyyyy Mommmmmmyyyyyyy?” and “I caaaaaannnn’tttt” as he was led to a squad car.
Caillou, now 21, is no stranger to controversy. He was arrested for DUI in 2010 and sent to rehab with his parents for pot addiction in 2011. While he has failed to replicate the commercial success of “Caillou” from the early years of his career, he has remained in the spotlight due to a string of high-profile relationships with Lindsay Lohan and Amanda Bynes.
Former best friend Clementine was reached for comment. “I love Caillou and am praying for him,” she said of her former co-star.
Caillou is estranged from his father, who had no comment. Caillou lives with his mother, in her basement, when he’s not living in a van down by the river.
His sister Rosie seems to have chosen a better path after childhood stardom. She is married to Joe from Blue’s Clues and lives in California with their two children.
As of press time a court date had not been set.
Stock image courtesy pbskids.org.