Once upon a time, I had a baby boy. I dressed him as a pumpkin for his first Halloween. Then I dressed him as a fluffy chicken for his second Halloween. I dressed him as a caterpillar for his third Halloween. As the years passed, my baby boy grew in wisdom and stature. He began [Read More]
A Sibling Story (or what I called my brother after he pushed me)
Will, 9, pushed Sydney, 5. It was over something trivial. She got mad. “You’re a big butthead who doesn’t like chicken nuggets and doesn’t like yourself!” she yelled. So, there!
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Me and the Tooth Fairy Just Don’t Get Along
Last week both my kids, ages 5 and 9, lost a tooth. And last week both kids expressed a “This is it?” attitude when they found $1 from the Tooth Fairy the next morning. Not enough kids? Grrr! Which leads me to today’s hilarious “Wit and Wisdom” guest post from Adrienne at The Mommy Mess. Adrienne originally [Read More]
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Why Motherhood Is Hard
It’s not the sleepless nights, whether that’s because you have a teenager out with his friends or a newborn who only sleeps 2 hours at a time. It’s not the worrying. Will my child’s best friend be kind to her today? Will my son make the baseball team? No, motherhood is hard because of summer [Read More]
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The Difference Between Moms and Dads
“I got an interesting call today at work,” I said to my husband. We were out on the deck, relaxing after work. “Oh?” “Yes, Little Johnny’s mom called me. She wanted to know if Will had a birthday party. Then she wanted to know if he did, then why didn’t he invite Little Johnny. And [Read More]
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Welcome Scary Mommy Readers!
Today I’m guest posting about my most embarrassing pregnancy side effect, vulvar varicosities, at ScaryMommy.com. If you’re visiting from Scary Mommy, welcome! My name is Katy and I was christened the “Experienced Bad Mom” by my friend Angie after everything I did wrong with my first child, Will, I started doing wrong with my second [Read More]
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The Picture of 9
This is the picture that gets taken when you turn 9-years-old: And this is the picture that gets taken when you turn 9-years-old and you have a little sister: I think 9 years old is going to be a good age. After all, my 9-year-old acted maturely by: 1) letting his little sister in the [Read More]
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Help Wanted
Wanted Experienced Bad Mom seeks stealthy individual capable of successfully tossing children’s artwork into the trash. Minimum requirements: 3-5 years of progressive responsibility getting rid of mountains of drawings, paintings, and the like. Must be able to bury artwork so that children cannot find it when they look in the trash. Must be able to [Read More]
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How to Build an Evil Virgo Beyblade
You know you want to know. Last night you probably woke up from a dead sleep, crying out, “We need more toilet paper! And HOW do you make an Evil Virgo Beyblade?” Ladies and gentleman, you will have to make your own trip to the store for toilet paper, but I CAN help you learn [Read More]
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Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
I’m putting my sarcastic, whiny self away today to celebrate the little things. Here is a picture of my daughter, Sydney, age 5. She is pretending to be “Mary Popsin” and is jumping off the back deck with her umbrella. Fly, little girl, fly! Mama’s got you. I’ve always got you. What have your kids [Read More]
