A Superlative Bad Mom Moment Starring Poop

Lucky me! I got to see the hit movie “Bad Moms” not once, but twice this summer.

If you can get past all the F-bombs, it really is a funny movie that pokes fun at so many Mommy truths.

My dear readers know that I consider myself a Bad Mom, just like the moms in the movie, because I’m not perfect. I don’t make organic gluten-free treats for the bake sale. Sometimes I let my kids watch too much TV or play too many video games. I work outside the home (gasp!). My kids ate baby food out of a jar.

I could go on.

But there is one moment in my journey as a mother that is perhaps my very favorite Bad Mom moment. I even shared it here on the blog SEVEN years ago.

(Heck, I’m not the *experienced* bad mom because I’m new at this!)

A Superlative Bad Mom Moment Starring Poop

My daughter, 2, was a bit feisty about going to bed one night. My husband was out of town on a business trip and I had had a long day of work and then taking care of her and her big brother.

I don’t know why she didn’t let the lengthy and tedious bedtime routine ease her into a blissful night’s rest.

I rocked her a few minutes and put her in her crib, but I wasn’t going to spend all night in the rocking chair. She knew how to go to sleep on her own.

But she kept crying out for me ,so after 10 minutes I went back into her room. She told me she had pooped in her diaper.

Okay, so now I know why she didn’t fall asleep easily.

I put her on the changing table, leaving the light off.

I took off her diaper.

“Can I see?” she asked when I was about to put her poopy diaper in the pail.

I paused.

“Yes,” I said.

I was tired, and not thinking people! (Did I tell you my husband was out of town?)

So I held up the diaper with poop in it for her to see. It was just a little turd ball.

You know what’s coming. It rolled out of the diaper and into her golden hair, splayed around her head as she lay there on the changing table.

“Where it go?” she asked.

In your hair, I thought. The Poop is in your hair.

I scooped it up with a wipe and threw it in the diaper pail. Then I decided that no, I was not going to give my daughter another bath and wash her hair. I simply rubbed some hand sanitizer on the spot where the poop had rolled.

Clean, dry, and free of poop on her butt and in her hair, my daughter went right to sleep.

Seven years later

The poop that touched her hair has not caused her to flunk a grade or be ostracized by classmates. She is growing well and has friends.

I do not put poop in her hair anymore, so maybe I’m a good mom after all. One and done, right?

What about you? Do you have a bad mom moment you’d like to share? One of the funniest parts of the Bad Moms movie is when all these moms start standing up at the PTA moment and confessing their so-called bad mommy-ness. We’re in this together, gals!