Funny Twitter Accounts To Follow For Laughs

My son, 14, is on Snapchat constantly.

Then there’s my husband, [age not given]. He likes to look at Instagram over his morning coffee.

Finally, my daughter, 11, is too young for a phone and doesn’t do social media. Although, yes, I know the time is coming soon.

But me?

Me, I like Twitter. It’s short, sweet and usually hilarious.

Here are the best funny Twitter accounts I follow for laughs. If you need someone new to follow who will brighten your day, may I suggest these Tweeps.

Abby Heugel

Abby (@AbbyHasIssues) is just a girl, trying to make us laugh. Her tagline: Hell hath no fury like me when I’m hungry and slightly inconvenienced.

Had too much coffee before Swiffering my floors and qualified for the Olympic finals in curling.

— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) February 11, 2018

My Food Network show would just be me reading the box, throwing it away, and then pulling it back out of the trash two minutes later.

— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) March 2, 2018

Myrna Tellingheusen

Myrna (@PearlsfromMyrna) is a little old lady telling it like it is from her retirement community. In her former life she was the executive secretary for Mr. Stanley Bogenshoots, Senior Vice President at Hughes Aircraft.

If Doris goes missing just check the buffet line. She’s the one loading her pocketbook with shrimp scampi.

— Myrna Tellingheusen (@PearlsFromMyrna) February 24, 2018

Nothing is more flattering than the fluorescent lighting in the appliance department at Sears.

— Myrna Tellingheusen (@PearlsFromMyrna) March 2, 2018

James Breakwell

James is a comedy writer and dad of 4 little girls under age 7 who provide endless material for his tweets (@XplodingUnicorn).

5-year-old: Am I grown-up yet?

Me: Are you tired?

5: No.

Me: You aren’t a grown-up.

— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) February 8, 2018

3-year-old: You married my mom.

Me: I did.

3: You didn’t ask me.

Me: It was before you were born.

3: That’s not very nice.

— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) February 28, 2018

Jennifer S. White

Jennifer (@yenniwhite) is a self-professed writing, blogging, sour ale drinking, stay-at-home-yoga mama machine. She’s got your funny parenting and life observation tweets covered. Plus, she’s got a knack for retweeting the best funny stuff on Twitter.

What I say: “Just a minute.”

What my toddler hears: “Ask again right now. And now. And…again, now. “

— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) February 22, 2018

pro·cras·ti·na·tion

prəˌkrastəˈnāSH(ə)n/

noun

the action of delaying or postponing something; i.e. when a dad does kids’ bedtime routine.

— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) February 24, 2018

Now it’s your turn. Any funny Twitter accounts or other jovial folks on social media channels you suggest that I follow? And, don’t forget to follow me on Twitter!